“ . . . There is little room for debate when I
write that we need to save the boy child. We need to protect the boy child from
the harmful influences of society. There is an urgent need to focus on the home
and school as we save the boy child. The boy child lives in a turbulent social
environment that makes him vulnerable to a multitude of negative forces. If a
boy child is neglected or fed a diet of hate and violence it is obvious he will
develop into a teenager who is misguided and confused. And the next crucial
transition into manhood will be even more difficult. The obvious question is –
why have we not dedicated a day that focuses on the Boy Child? We must
not allow the continued imbalance of the gender scale. We cannot ignore that
without a focus on both the boy child and girl child, then gender equality is
not a reality. . . “
Jerome Teelucksingh, Ph.D.
Gender Issues Thought Leader, International men’s day Founder,
and inaugurator of “World Day Of The Boy Child”
The
powerful statement that you have just read, penned by Jerome Teelucksingh,
Ph.D., a Gender Issues Thought Leader, Founder of International Men’s Day, and
inaugurator of World Day Of The Boy Child which will be observed on 16 May
2018, is a reminder that individuals, organizations, and institutions
throughout our global village must improve the manner in which we protect
Boys. While girls are deemed to be
fragile and vulnerable, boys are equally fragile and vulnerable as they make
their journey from childhood to adulthood in a world that telegraphs to them
mixed signals about masculinity, their societal roles and responsibilities when
they mature into adults, and negative stereotypical images through film,
television dramas and situation comedies, music videos and social media. Boys emerge from the womb with the same set
of emotions as girls. Girls are allowed
to express their full range of emotions, but when boys reach a certain age they
are socialized not to express their natural and spontaneous reaction to
rejection, disappointment, and physical, psychological, spiritual, and
emotional pain. Boys are taught that
allowing themselves to be vulnerable or to seek help is not “manly” and that
their strength lies in not allowing themselves to become or appear to be
vulnerable. In actuality, strength is
about vulnerability. When you are
vulnerable, you are standing in front of another soul spiritually,
psychologically, and emotionally naked.
It takes a strong soul to take the risk of standing in front of another
soul – spiritually, psychologically, and emotionally naked. Is it any wonder that the suicide rate for
boys and adolescent males is higher than that of girls and adolescent females? And is it any wonder that so many Boys and
adolescent males are consumed with repressed anger that they explode – engage in aggressive and
violent behavior – or implode –
commit suicide or self-medicate with drugs, alcohol, food, or sex to end their
excruciating spiritual, emotional, and psychological pain?
We
must rethink the manner in which we are socializing boys and adolescent males –
Our Sons.
On World Day Of The Boy Child and every day thereafter, individuals,
organizations, and institutions must collaboratively work to create pathways to
emotional freedom for boys and adolescent males. We can create pathways to emotional freed
from boys and adolescent males by:
·
Rewriting
the narrative on strength and masculinity by equating strength with
vulnerability.
·
Staffing
all clinics and medical facilities in all communities with at least one (1)
mental health professional who is sensitive to and can effectively address the
unique emotional, spiritual, and psychological issues experienced by boys and
adolescent males.
·
Addressing
the role that Fatherlessness and the lack of a strong male presence in the
lives of Boys and adolescent males in their spiritual, psychological, and
emotional wounding.
·
Engaging
the boys and adolescent males in our lives in a conversation – a real
conversation – about their emotional, spiritual, and psychological reaction to
disappointments, rejections, and perceived failures. We must ask questions: “How do
you feel about what happened? Are you
happy? Are you sad? Do you feel numb? How can I make things better for you? What can I do to help you get through this
difficult experience?” And we
cannot accept the typical response of “Nothing’s
wrong. I’m okay.”
·
Recognizing
the symptoms of mental, emotional and spiritual distress which take the form of
behavioral changes These behavioral
changes can take the form of, among other things, poor grooming and hygiene,
withdrawal, insomnia, excessive moodiness, and loss of appetite.
Boys and young adolescent males –
particularly, in marginalized communities -- are academically underperforming
their female counterparts in a number of nations which include the United
States. As an example, girls outperform boys in reading and writing on
standardized tests in a number of nations. They are more
likely to be categorized by educators and school administrators as
“intellectually challenged” and “behavior problems”, warehoused in Special
Education classes, and diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder/Attention
Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder and placed on psychotropic medications such as
Ritalin, than their female counterparts.
A collaborative effort must be
undertaken to examine and resolve the underlying causative factors for the
academic underperformance of boys and adolescent males and the obstacles they
must hurdle over:
·
School districts, administrators, educators, parents and concerned
key stakeholders must set quantitative literacy goals for boys and adolescent
young male. Every boy and adolescent young male enrolled in school must have
a reading, writing, and reading comprehension level which is at least
equivalent to his grade level, if not one grade above his current grade level.
·
Let’s examine why boys and adolescent males are performing poorly
in reading and writing on standardized tests. Is it because the subject
matter of the reading and writing materials do not capture the imagination of
boys and adolescent young males? Do the school districts, educators and
administrators need to develop and implement a “boy-friendly” reading and
writing curriculum? Is the development of reading and writing skills not
being encouraged and monitored at home?
·
What factors are involved in the categorization by educators and
school administrators of boys and adolescent young males as “intellectually
challenged” and “behavior problems” at a much higher rate than their female
counterparts? How can these factors be addressed and resolved?
·
In view of the fact that a definitive test for Attention Deficit
Disorder or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder is not often administered
by educators and school administrators, they must look closely at the behavior
of boys and adolescent young males to determine if their behavior which may
appear to be Attention Deficit Disorder or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity
Disorder is actually something else which does not warrant Ritalin or other
psychotropic medications being prescribed. Let’s look at
nonpharmacologic remedies such as yoga, transcendental meditation and diet
modification – the reduction of sugar intake in the daily diet of boys and
adolescent young males.
·
Let’s recruit and employ more male teachers in school districts
and schools where disciplinary and “behavior problems” issues are higher among
boys and adolescent young males than their female counterparts -- particularly
in marginalized communities.
·
The impact that Fatherlessness and the absence of positive male
role models in communities and households have on the academic underperformance
of boys and adolescent males and their propensity to be categorized as
“intellectually challenged” and “behavior problems” must be looked at and
resolved.
When boys and adolescent males – Our
Sons – look out at the world that exists beyond their immediate environment, do
they see legitimate real-life options?
Will they, in fact, have access to legitimate real-life options? Most
importantly, do these souls have the cognitive and technical skills set which
many, if not all, legitimate real-life options require? A number of boys and adolescent males – Our
Sons – look at the world outside of
their immediate environment and do not see a future for themselves. World Day Of The Boy Child can become the
platform from which institutions, organizations, and individuals throughout our
global village launch and facilitate global, national, regional, and local
academic enrichment programs, leadership initiatives, mentoring programs that
offer tutoring in mathematics, writing, reading, foreign languages and science;
and internship programs which lead to permanent employment for boys and
adolescent males. To ensure that boys
and adolescent males know that they can have access to legitimate real life
options, it is incumbent upon institutions, organizations, and individuals to
collaboratively design and implement field trips for boys and adolescent males
to universities, community colleges, businesses, medical institutions, law
firms, broadcasting and communications organizations, and information
technology companies and to help establish internships which will lead to
full-time employment for boys and adolescent young males. At the same time, we must introduce boys and
adolescent males to the world of entrepreneurship. We must equip them with the necessary skills
and tools they will need to create legitimate real-life options for themselves
and for other members of their community.
Rethinking the manner in which we
resocialize boys and adolescent males so that they mature into psychologically,
spiritually, and emotionally vibrant adults; removing the key challenges and
barriers that exist which prevent them from excelling academically and
acquiring the essential skills and tools they will need to become productive
and successful adults; introducing them to and preparing them to access
legitimate real-life options are critical “key pieces of the puzzle” to
protecting boys and adolescent males.
Protecting boys and adolescent males and creating a safe and nurturing
environment for them, protects everyone and creates a safe and nurturing
environment in which protects everyone.
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